November 18th, 2012

“I have read lots of books and written lots of book reviews, but have never contacted an author until today. I recently read your book Death Benefits and I am so grateful to have found this resource. It has helped me immensely so I needed to let you know how much your book has touched and helped me. I lost my dad about 2 months ago. I have been angry with him since 1990 due to his alcoholism and treatment of my brother, mother, myself, and his own body that I was completely ambivalent about his death and everything involved with it….I set out to figure out why I was so unhinged with grief. I went to a few grief counseling sessions (not helpful) and read no less than 10 books about death, dying, and grief (also not helpful).

Then one day I was at the library and found your book. When I got to page 35, where you wrote “Appreciating and admiring her did not cancel out how difficult it had been to be her daughter, especially for the last quarter century when so little felt real” I was so happy to have found someone who understands, who gets ME and doesn’t just throw religion and stages of grief at me. I felt very strongly that I needed to thank you for putting your experience and research onto paper. I’ve said lots of words here, but do not have quite the right words to describe how helpful your book has been.”